Values – Want things to just click?

Know and honor your values! What’s intrinsically important to you?

In coaching, values are not morals. They are what is intrinsically important to you. You would not be who you are without honoring at least some of your values.

Identifying your values is a fascinating process that occurs over time, with awareness. Often the values that are the most important to you are the least obviousthough you often could not imagine your life without them being honored.

In this post we are going to address a Nuts and Bolts AIM Coaching essential to your peace of mind – Values. I’ll cover the following….

  • #1 of 3) What is going on when your values are being honored or not, and what to do in a compromising situation.  
  • #2 of 3) Example of how to use values to identify something not working.
  • #3 of 3) What about you? Pick one of eleven values listed and comment!



#1 of 3) What is going on when your values are being honored or not, and what to do in a compromising situation…. 

When your values are totally being honored, your life is fulfilling + awesome.  Everything falls into place. Things “click.” You easily “see” or experience life that way.

The things that could otherwise distract or bother you are inconsequential as you have “enough good stuff” to ride out any “moments.”

At the Coaches Training Institute (CTI Co-Active Coaches Training, CPCC), we were taught that values are the boat on the river of life. So, it is up to you to be sailing along in the kind of vessel that suits you.

Imagine you are facing a lot of challenges, maybe even positive ones, don’t you think a sturdy, yet flexible boat you know how to navigate is the best plan? Versus just “hoping for the best? Or, maybe a fast, swift boat with an engine.

The point is – knowledge of your values, allows you to make decisions quickly, avoid pitfalls, and weather storms.

That is why is it one of the first things premier private coaching clients address. It can change your life profoundly for the better, fast, to know the best boat for your journey! – What values you must honor. 

When your values have not been honored, life has been or is boring, dull, irritating, frustrating, uncertain, even terrifying!

In those moments, you can’t put your finger on what exactly is bugging you or why you feel afraid. The irritation is elusive. Like those people who stomp around and say “I am not mad, I never get mad” — that slippery, but to yourself (insert blindspot material)! 

This is why making your values a personal ongoing study allows life experience to serve you daily. The faster you know “it’s not for you, there is no negotiating on this, the better!”

There are times when you need to compromise one but not all of your values to get along with a person you can’t avoid due to circumstances. Or, to do your job. Or, because of timing that seems out of your control. Perhaps it seems you have to wait for another person before moving forward.

At these times it is useful to know your hierarchy of values. Then, shift your attention to the highest expression of your values that you can honor. This is a way to have a “handle” on what you can impact strategically.

The goal is for your potential frustration over the value not getting full recognition to dissipate vs. interfere with an otherwise delightful experience ahead. Your overall peace of mind matters!

Uncertainty is stressful and not honoring our values increases uncertainty.
Back to the boat analogy, if you know your resource(s) you know how long you can last or when it is time to change or get help, vs. tolerate.

You may not always be able to honor every single value of yours in life. Do your best to honor the highest expression of your values you can at all times to keep your peace of mind.


#2 of 3) An example of how to use values to identify something not working….

With definition of your values it is easier to identify what is or is not working in any given situation.

For example:

Imagine a person who has a value called humor, but is not conscious to the fact. Say that person is visiting someone who never laughs. 

They may feel disenchanted with the relationship and not know why, until they recognize that humor is a part of who they are and they may feel their humor is suppressed around that person.

Having a clearer sense of your values, you will more immediately recognize situations, people and things that shall enhance and reinforce who you are and who you are becoming.

When you consciously come from a place of values, you make decisions more easily, as decisions can be made based on a personal foundation.

Values serve as a reference point when prioritizing actions, commitments and goals. 

#3 of 3) What about you? 

Note:   If you can’t relate to any of these or aren’t connecting….You have other “values” not listed here. Private clients are given 144 options to choose from, cull and combine.

Pick one of eleven values listed and comment!

You may also see a “value cluster” here….Like a main value of Balance:

Cluster Example #1 — Balance/Ease/Clarity/Simplicity/Natural/Nurturing/ or

Cluster Example #2 — Balance /Aesthetics/Elegance/Harmony/Order/Peace/

  • Aesthetics
  • Balance
  • Clarity
  • Ease
  • Elegance
  • Harmony
  • Natural
  • Nurturing
  • Order
  • Peace
  • Simplicity


Shannon Seek, B.S. CPCC CPO

— Shannon Seek, B.Sc., CPCC, CPO, Focus Strategy Coach to Omni-talented Go-Getter Genius Types + Founder

I coach omni-talented, go-getter genius types like you to organize business success + lifestyle priorities to effectively do, be, have what you love every day. All day. I’ve also assembled a team of expert, vetted coaches to assist as needed.

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